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| October 10, 2009
Note from the President
Greetings Colleagues! I am frequently made aware of all the extraneous noise in our environment. I know about Pam and Meredith and some gossip surrounding their work. I know about the hospital patient who is still bleeding. I heard that several times, loudly, in the span of about 30 seconds. It’s not that I don’t care about others or their situations. I was not intentionally eavesdropping on cell phone conversations of others. I don’t know any of these people. As I was having lunch in one of my favorite casual eateries with a friend recently, I was dismayed that the music was so loud we could barely carry on a conversation. When I requested that the volume be lowered, I was informed that it was computerized and set to get louder as the noise got louder in the restaurant. It’s not one of my favorite places to go any more. We live in a culture of noise. Noise seems to fill every moment. As great communicators, it is important to seek silence and to honor it when listening in a committed way to another. How will you honor silence today? Warmly, Frances Shuster, PCCOur Monthly Newsletter
Sounds of Silence We all live in a fast-paced, noise filled world that seems to become louder each day. Even when we try to escape and relax, we continue to stay attached to cell phones, computers, iPod and many other forms of technology that interrupt any possibility to experience total quiet. We are so accustomed to having noise around us that we are often very uncomfortable with silence and yet we know that silence is a critical attribute of skillful listening. We can all plead guilty to being distracted while trying to listen or formulating what we are going to say next before the other person even completes their thought. In coaching, each of us is eager to use the variety of skills that we have learned to encourage our clients to see themselves as capable of self-discovery, problem solving, reflection and change. Our training and practical experience as coaches may lead to a tendency to be very busy focusing our attention when we are with a client. We all know the value of active listening in the coaching process and silence is an effective and essential tool in listening. How does silence factor into our coaching skills? Gandhi says, "In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness." Silence when used in conversation may empower another person and help build a relationship as well. This is a challenge -- to be comfortable with just being quiet is an acquired art. Silence can produce some of the best results of reflection and insight because we give a client the gift of time to work things out in their own brain. When we hold back and remain silent, we allow clients to discover more about what they are thinking and feeling and what they really want and also how we can best help them. It helps clients slow down their minds to discover more effective solutions to areas of concern. We give them a time and place to dig deeper and deal with an issue. Silence can lead clients to a break through or catharsis –- that great leap to new understanding. An added benefit of silence occurs because we send a strong message that the client’s words and insights are important. This can help a person feel a sense of increased capacity. Silence is active attention and can be fully effective in coaching when the client accepts trust and support from the coach. Silence when used correctly is not abandonment—it is heightened presence. What happens on the other side of silence is often an exercise of problem solving, innovation, thinking and brilliant ahas! Silence can be uncomfortable. We must learn to become comfortable with the uncomfortable. We need to give clients assurance that we are listening and interested and that they are cared for while the silence settles in. It can be a powerful tool for those who use it well. Silence works wonders in letting clients know that we see them as capable. Silence also allows us to listen better to ourselves. Utilizing the sounds of silence is truly a tool in the masterful coach’s art of communication. Jane Bidlack serves as a leadership coach with Coaching For Results, Inc. She has been a school administrator for seventeen years and delights in offering individual support for current school leaders to realize their full potential through the coaching process. For more information about Jane and our other coaches, go to www.coachingschoolresults.com and click on “coaches.”
See details and register at www.coachingschoolresults Each seminar below has a series of three, hour-long follow-up teleclasses specifically designed for seminar participants and provided at a nominal fee. Those registering for a seminar will want to be sure to sign up for the follow-up teleclasses!
CFR to Launch First Webinar! Join us on the web! The Phenomenon of Coaching A one-hour webinar designed for all leaders interested in learning about the WORLD WIDE influence of Coaching. Share in the amazing impact of coaching around the world and the recognized status that has been achieved in education and beyond. Far from the fad or this-year-hot-thing COACHING is being utilized as the go to process for impacting change and long term RESULTS! How do we support this powerful process and way of being to continue to influence the important work in schools and for students in our world? What commitment will we make to continue to increase our craft and precision as coaches to ensure and expand the wonder of this work? Come and enjoy this hour for inspiration, motivation, and renewed commitment to our work. Kathy Kee, Professional Certified Coach, and Founding Member of CFR, Inc. will team up with Graham Hoult, ACC, and renowned Australian Coach, to present an informative and interactive webinar. You won’t want to miss this one! Graham Hoult is a B. Ec. Dip. Ed., ACC, is a certified coach through the International Coach Federation (ICF). He took an active role in the establishment of the ICF in Australasia, as well as instigating and hosting the Special Interest Group, Coaching Educators, via a monthly international teleconference. Formerly, he was a teacher, principal, and educational administrator with the Victorian Department of Education, in Australia. Mr Hoult has written extensively on the subject of coaching and education, including Coaching Educators: Fad, fashion or valuable new approach to developing and supporting our key people? IARTV Occasional Paper No. 93, Dec. 2005. Kathy Kee is a professional coach and consultant, rehired after 38 years in education. As an Assistant Superintendent, Kathy led her Texas district to the highest ranking of Exemplary by coaching and supporting her school leaders and teachers to their very best results. She is the past President of NSDC and TSDC and currently serves as Co-director of Teaching and Learning for Coaching School Results. See details and register now at www.coachingschoolresults
Tolle offers insights into the power of silence as well as illuminating differences between being and doing and discusses presence in depth. This is a thought-provoking book. You can purchase A New Earth at www.amazon.com.
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A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle