Coaching School Results Newsletter

Volume 2. Issue 12

DECEMBER 2006

Raising Our Consciousness About The Nature of Conversations
Part II

In last month’s newsletter, we spoke about one of two premises that Susan Scott makes in her book, Fierce Conversations. That premise was “our lives succeed or fail one conversation at a time.” Related to that is the second premise - The conversation is the relationship – which is the focus of this month’s article.

Consider how many conversations you have during one given day? Estimate how many opportunities you have to impact another by the way you “show up” or through the words you choose to say or not to say?

What kind of conversation enhances our relationships? What behaviors, if practiced, add value to every conversation we have whether it is with a colleague, a family member, an acquaintance, or with ourselves?

Scott emphasizes that leaders must have conversations that interrogate reality, provoke learning, tackle tough challenges, and enrich relationships. Further, she offers the coaching conversation as one of four conversations that can become a workhorse for the organization.

She defines a coaching conversation as “engaging individuals and teams in conversations which increase clarity, improve understanding, and provide impetus for change, resulting in professional development, the advancement of projects and accelerated results.”

If we believe that the conversation is the relationship, then every conversation counts.

Each conversation holds the potential for adding value to the relationship, flat lining it, or diminishing it. By offering full presence, authenticity, and complete listening we can enhance our relationships with others.

Think about a recent conversation you have had.

How did you show up?
What behaviors were you intentional about?
How authentic were you?
What kind of “emotional wake” did you leave? Was it an “afterglow” or an “after taste”?

Plan for your next conversation now.

How will you “be” different?
What level of attention will you bring?
What level of commitment will you bring to conversations with the people most important to you?

By Karen Anderson, Board Member

TRAINING OPPORTUNITIES